2018 be like

"I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker" (qaaaaa) 08/05/2018 at 11:04 • Filed to: Politics

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We have a new special envoy to Russia. It’s Steven Seagal.

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boredalways > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 08/05/2018 at 11:19

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WTF? So one sexual abuser will talk with another sexual abuser (and watersports aficionado) at the behest of the true leader of the FSB?

A shame, really, because it would be better as action movie instead of real life.

/s

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 08/05/2018 at 11:21

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calling him an actor is a bit of a stretch no?

that was pretty funny tho

but yeah sure special envoy seagull why not....seems about right nowadays actually

McMike > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 08/05/2018 at 11:21

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Above the LOL

I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 08/05/2018 at 11:26

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Steven “A Flock of” Seagal

OmerCarrothers333 > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 08/05/2018 at 11:32

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Godfuckingdamnit, those motherfuckers are REALLY getting off on fucking with us.

ttyymmnn > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 08/05/2018 at 11:46

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Col. Austin Travis. LOL. 

LOREM IPSUM > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 08/05/2018 at 11:46

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If Seth Rogan and James Franco can create a movie that pushed us closer to thermonuclear war than we’ve been in a lot of peoples lifetime, Segal can give being peacemaker a whack. What the hell, why not? He already has a rapport with them, so I guess there are worse choices out there.  I mean, we could send Chuck Schumer, but chances are we’d be at war within moments after his plane landed...

ttyymmnn > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 08/05/2018 at 11:46

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Just when you thought things couldn't get more absurd. 

Mr. FiSTer of Team FiST Fetish > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 08/05/2018 at 11:50

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F-117 tho..

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > ttyymmnn 08/05/2018 at 12:03

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*points at own username*

saw it coming a mile away :p

ttyymmnn > Mr. FiSTer of Team FiST Fetish 08/05/2018 at 12:20

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With a passenger compartment. LOL intensifies. 

boredalways > McMike 08/05/2018 at 13:46

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...ah, those were the days!

For Sweden > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 08/05/2018 at 14:38

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Russia appointed him, not the USA.

Ash78, voting early and often > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 08/05/2018 at 15:16

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Tom Segura on Seagal. A few years old but still hilarious:

winterlegacy, here 'till the end > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 08/05/2018 at 15:28

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He’s good at walking along the avenue

LastFirstMI is my name > I like cars: Jim Spanfeller is one ugly motherfucker 08/05/2018 at 15:46

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Well, Chuck Norris is head of the NSA, so this seems about right. 

duurtlang > winterlegacy, here 'till the end 08/05/2018 at 16:02

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He's been using stunt doubles for his walking scenes for a decade or two now.

duurtlang > LOREM IPSUM 08/05/2018 at 16:04

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Shumer? Norris. Send Chuck Norris to negotiate with Steven Sea gal.

WRXforScience > For Sweden 08/05/2018 at 18:32

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Yup, OP has it backwards. Russia is sending Segal to the US to fight for Russia (I’m pretty sure this is the opposite of the plots of half his ‘movies’).

coqui70 > LastFirstMI is my name 08/05/2018 at 22:06

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Not sure why we haven’t used the Chuck Norris option yet ... his squint alone can stop a bad guy.

So Shiney. So Chrome! So Frunky > LastFirstMI is my name 08/06/2018 at 09:23

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The weather outlook for the area around Chuck Norris : 100% Chance of Pain